Reaching the End of the Rope

As people who follow me has seen over the past few months, I have been seeing someone ‘Mr Hazel Eyes‘ and now it is over. I don’t do people who take the piss and it seemed too much effort to get a little nookie. So I made the choice to send the ‘Fine. I won’t bother you again’ after this person led on to believe he was coming over and we could spend some time together. This has happened twice and to hell, with him if I am letting it happen for a third. So that is all done. Occasionally we have to be good to ourselves and release the bad things back to where they came from, into the ether so to speak and forget about them. Truth is, I can’t be bothered. I have just begun at University and I am loving the new opportunity that I have been given.

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I am studying Social Science and this involves psychology, social theory and politics. One thing it has taught me already, and that I need someone more on my level and not somebody who has an opinion and just wants validation they have the answer and are right. The Mr or Mrs I have to be right all the time is a waste of time. They are not interested in you or what you have to say. It is all about them catching you in a trap, it could be your use of wording, an undecided opinion or even the admittance that you aren’t that familiar with a subject and then they run with it. Trying to be the bigger and better person because you faulted in your wording, you were wrong even though you said ‘I don’t know much about the subject.’ or ‘I didn’t mean it like that.’ They will continue to remind you of what you said when you tripped up and usually the conversation always goes back to the time you were wrong and they were right.  This is exhausting and unless the person has a fat wallet, big cock and a good job that takes them away for months on end, isn’t worth keeping up with. Ditch it and breathe.

Author Nicolajayne TaylorNicolajayne Taylor

This is a short article because I really just wanted to get this out of my system. ‘Mr Hazel Eyes’ stood me up, did all of the above when I did see him and we only had a handful of precious moments, during the early hours of the morning when he would finally decide to perform what he was there to do. He was supposed to be just a ‘dial a ride.’ A bit of fun and nothing too serious but nope, he has got tangled up in his insecurity and in the semantics that it has got lost in translation.

I am looking forward to finding someone I can talk to about the wider world, universe and deeper conversations than who is right and who is wrong. I want someone to share exotic food and drinks with and just have a good time. I want someone who wants to be with me and I want to want to be with them.

Love is a fickle thing these days and we take it for granted. We abuse it and those that are all love. I want people to be good to one another, respect and consideration are rare qualities in this day and age.

So I will post how my first assignment went next week. I hope you all have a good week and take care of yourself.

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